Contradictory Much?

A few days ago I posted as my facebook status:

"Disney and Wii suggest that you increase the family fun by starting a game of "hide and seek" with the Wii remote. I have a feeling that whoever would start that "fun" little game in most families would be on the receiving end of a beat down."

I am not kidding. This was a little blurb on one of their adverts in Family Fun magazine. Now, don't get me wrong. I like Family Fun magazine. I have no beef with Wii. And even Disney has it's place in relatively small increments.

("Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog.")

But I digress. Let us recognize this blurb for what it is, people. A half-hearted attempt to pacify us for creating the brain crack that makes our kids want to zone out in front of the telly 24/7. It's a weak "hey, you might want to get up and run somewhere, anywhere, anyone?....." It's a pathetic suggestion that kids actually get some exercise and relate to each other without an electronic device. But wait, there is still an electronic device involved. Don't play Hide and Seek by hiding yourself. Hide the remote, which is sure to bring on not a few panic attacks when the youngest family member actually forgets where they have hidden the remote. Then you will have to attach one of those clapper alarms to it to insure that "Precious" is never lost again.

But there is a way to work this in your favor. You hid the remote, fake temporary amnesia and send the kids, GASP, outside to play locking the door behind them. That gives you amply time with the Wii all to yourself.

To be fair, it is not only Wii and Disney that do this. PBS is another culprit. Interspersed between episode after insipid episode are admonitions to "Be happy and healthy, eat right." or actors in flea bitten costumes trying to get the kids to follow them in jumping jacks.

And doesn't even The Biggest Loser get in on the action by telling is to do push ups during the commercials? Is this their attempt to assuage their guilt for gluing us to the tube, thus prolonging our sedentary lifestyle?

I wouldn't really know, I'm usually watching the Food Network where Paula Deen unashamedly uses copious amounts of butter without telling me to drop and give her twenty while waiting for her return.

I think I will stop here, if you don't mind. The kids are banging on the front door, and I need to go kick some Wii tushy. That is, after I find the Wii remote.